Today I’d like to share with you a few pitfalls I encounter coaching female professionals and I must say I can see the same patterns over and over. So, why talking about the best ways to screw up your career instead of the best ways to move it up? Because I have been through this and it is easier to recognize ourselves in what we are not doing well instead of what we are doing well. Women are quite good at identifying what their weaknesses are and what they should improve. So let’s start!
First best way to screw up your career
Not being authentic and letting other people define success for you.
Choosing your career or a new role regarding what you think other people expect from you over what you really love. How many women do you know who chose a career path not related to what they are really thrilled about but what they think will bring security and recognition? … a lot, and I most of all! And you might tell me, men as well. True!
But, I realized women have a great sense of purpose and need to feel that their work contributes someway to nurture who they are, and this reward cannot only be external like a good paycheck, a prestigious position. at least not on a long run. They need to make an impact, at least it is what I observed from really successful and happy executive women.
Because at some point, no matter how your pay check is good or your position a leadership one, if you don’t find meaning and passion in your work, you will be unhappy and it is not sustainable.
Second best way to screw up your career:
Lack of emotional awareness.
Most often when my clients come to me, it is because they feel unmotivated, disengaged, confused. They all come with EMOTIONS, you know the uncomfortable ones! They have tried to bottle up their emotions but actually it doesn’t work because emotions is part of us as functioning human beings. And emotions are the first clue that your needs are not met. So when you feel uncomfortable emotions, they relate to a need which is not fulfilled.
Third best way to screw up your career:
Not expressing your needs.
If you just comply, try to fit in other people’s requirements, at some point you will lose your energy. Expressing your needs can be done on a powerful way, without blaming people or circumstances. It is about respecting yourself and own your power of standing up for yourself.
Fourth best way to screw up your career
Dwelling into problems.
Whatever the problem is, difficult team workers or managers, a pressuring job, a boring job, dwelling into problems will not be helpful because you create your reality. What you think is what will happen. Therefore, move your focus on what result you want to see and make it happen!
Fifth best way to screw up your career
Not recovering from a setback.
We all experience setbacks and we all feel resentment, disappointment about them. But they are all part of the game. Failure is not good to experience but in hindsight, it can be an opportunity for better. Let’s reframe F.A.I.L into First Attempt In Learning.
Marie Dancer is a Women Career & Leadership coach who helps professional women to pursue their career with greater clarity, meaning and authenticity. She also work s for organisations which want to develop a trust building culture, trust being the bridge between business needs for results and human needs for connection.